An overwhelming day with Mr. "Chink Positve" Chinkee Tan

I remember back in May 2013 during my term as the VP for External Affairs of ABSC, I was assigned to invite guest speakers for our Leadership Training Seminar entitled “ILLUMINATE”. I was believing God for an excellent speaker and true enough God answered my prayer. I was able to invite Mr. Chinkee Tan. He is one of the best and one of the most sought-after speakers in the Philippines and Asia today. It was a great privilege to really hear him speak, inspire and invest in the lives of the young leaders of UST.

A year after our encounter in UST, I was again given the chance to listen to him but this time, in a more mature crowd – In front of a government organization. I was excited to listen to him again because we really got inspired and had fun at the same time during his session in our leadership training seminar in UST. Honestly I thought I would hear the same things he mentioned during his talk with us - only to find out that it was just the tip of the iceberg.

Allow me to share some of the insights I got during his overwhelming talk. I am not exaggerating, I’m just being honest.

He first talked about CHANGE. He talked about how it was so abused and how our politics in the Philippines would dare use it as a slogan during election campaign period. Change must happen if we want to see improvements happen in our lives. A lot of us do the same thing and expect to see a different result then we ask ourselves: What’s happening? And the answer is: Nothing. We love how technology has made our lives more convenient by allowing itself to be changed overtime but we hate change when it happens to our own lives. Why won’t we? Because we have fears or False Expectations Appearing Real. According to research, 90% of the things we fear will not happen.  It’s an amazing fact – it’s also amazing to find out that we are crippled with the 10%.

He shares this basic formula:
Mindset + Action = Result

Negative Mindset + Negative Action = Negative Result

Positive Mindset + Positive Action = Positive Result

Poor Mindset + Poor Action = Poor Result

Rich Mindset + Rich Action = Rich Result

For real and long-lasting change to happen in our lives, we have to decide to change our mindset. How will we know if we have a negative mindset? When we complain and compare. People who often complain miss the knowledge and maturity that they could gain. People who compare themselves to others either breeds pride in them for being better or breeds in security for feeling less of a person. For most of us, it’s easier to complain and compare because it’s difficult for us to be ourselves.

For us Filipinos, it’s very difficult to confront someone who has an issue with us which ends up in gossip. Gossip separates close friends. Gossip is a form of an emotional immaturity because it shows that we cannot properly handle our issues with each other. When we entertain gossip, it means we don’t value the people around us – we don’t value the relationships we have.

When we correct a person we must always remember the principle: “Correct in private, praise in Public.” We should always choose to speak life to the people around us but when correction is done, it must be done in private.

“Kahit tama ako pero pag ako na ang nakasakit ng tao – mali na ako”. One of Chinkee Tan’s life principles. It reminded me of another famous quote: People do not care how much you know until they know how much you care. The similarity between the two is this: it puts value to the person.

One of the most exciting parts of the session was when Chinkee Tan discussed about the different personalities of people. It is important to note that behaviour changes but personality does not. The strengths and weaknesses of each person’s personality allow them work together in unity and move as a single unit in achieving their goals as an organization and their behaviour allows them to adjust to the needs around them.

Part of developing the unity of their organization is to face the issues they have with each other. Whether it is big or small – it must be dealt with. After being convinced that they need to change, knowing themselves more with the help of others, working together, improving their unity – they need to face their unsettled issues. They were given a chance to speak to all their colleagues personally. They can either ask for forgiveness or tell how much they appreciate the person in front of them. It was a very important part of the seminar because it turns a simple organization into a family.

As a family and an organization, it is very crucial to know their destination by stating in their vision and mission and coming up with their own core values. “Everything we do must be guided by the vision and mission”. When the vision and mission is properly communicated to the members of the organization (of any organization), they will not waste time doing things that will not contribute to their vision and mission. Every member will work, regardless of their position, having the vision and mission in mind.

I can go on blogging about the things I learned but there’s just too many. From the need to change, to knowing one’s self and understanding others, to strengthening teamwork and unity, to settling issues and anchoring themselves to their core values, vision and mission – an organization changes and it turns into a family.

Every time I come home from seminar like this, I will always remember what sir Chinkee Tan said during the middle part of the training:

“It’s not how much knowledge you know, it’s how much knowledge you apply.”

What I learned from one of Mama's reminders ...

Whenever I would go out and bring our family's car, my mother and I would most of the times have this kind of conversation:

Me: Ma, alis na po ako. Dalhin ko po yung kotse.
Mama: Okay. Ingat ka. Ayos pa ba gas niyan?
Me: (Recalls the last time I used it) Opo ma, abot pa ng Baguio to. hehe

Mama: Anong Baguio ka diyan? Lagpas pa ba ng kalahati yan? 

Me: Medyo mababa po sa linya ng kalahati.
Mama: Ah ganun ba? Sige. Magpakarga ka na. Mas mahal magpa-tow kaysa sa magpa-gas. Ito pero oh. 

Our car's full tank is around 70 to 75L (if I'm not mistaken), so half of it is 35L and this can reach quite a distance if you're on a long drive. Maybe you can still go to Baguio or Dau (like what my father would always tell my mother when they have the same conversation). Point is, it's far from being empty and being towed by a truck. 

However, Mama mentioned something about towing. She said that it's more costly for our car to be towed than to refill the car's gas tank. My mother was not after the distance the car can travel but the car's condition and of course, our safety. 

It's quite similar with how we view our relationship with God. 

You see, in our lives, God placed boundary lines. These lines limit us, restrict us, hinder us but most especially - the lines protect us. From what? From being empty or worse - getting towed. 

In our walk with God, there are lines that we shouldn't cross. Not because it's sin but because it's just not wise. Or like what my mother would tell me: it's for your own safety. There's nothing wrong about being safe if you're up against sin. 

What shall we do then? Learn from my mother. 

In my point of view, it's okay if you go below the middle line because it is still far from being empty.  My  mother's point of view was "Why do you have to wait till you are nearly empty if you can be safe and stay above the line?". My goal was for the car not being empty of gas, my mother's goal was a full tank or at least closer to it. What the difference? The way we treat the car.

If we see these boundary lines as something that would limit, restrict or hinder us then we'll treat our relationship with God as something that's full of limitations, restrictions and hindrances instead of experiencing true Freedom and we will find ourselves burned out.

If we keep on saying okay lang 'yan, di naman sin 'yan eh; or wala namang sinasabi sa Bible na ganyan, etc. we'll just keep on compromising, and compromising and compromising until we realize that we're just only one foot away from falling into sin. The price to pay in falling into sin is much costly than the price we have to pay in avoiding it. 

When we are more concerned with not falling into sin (not reaching the empty level of the gas tank) there's a big tendency to miss the point of not sinning but when we are more concerned with dwelling at the center of God's plan for us and giving Him the Glory (getting closer to the full level of the gas tank), we see everything we do as a product of the Joy of Salvation.

After all, when it comes to asking God for Presence in our lives, He would always urge His people to ask for more - more than being full or filled with the Spirit, we overflow.